The Best Show I'm Not Watching (sorta-spoiler alert)

It pains me to be without my HBO right now. I really wish I could watch this final season of The Wire, but I will have to wait until the DVD release (which hopefully won't be too long after the series ends). I'm spoiling myself a little by reading the recaplets TWoP does, but not the full recaps because I want to go in sorta fresh. That doesn't stop me from being spoiled like getting the news about my favorite character. It saddens me, but then this cracks me up.

Bored Baby Bored (Spoiler Warning!)

I watched Gone Baby Gone last night and was highly disappointed. I really can't figure out what all the hoopla was about. The film was mediocre at best. The first 2/3 of it were decent and engagin although I found Casey Affleck's character irritating. (Speak up, you mumbling fuck!) When the plot twisting got underway, I was completely underwhelmed. I won't blame Ben Affleck because he only directed the film. I don't know if the book was that lame or the screenwriter couldn't figure out how to fit the book's premise into a 2 hour film, but something got lost in translation.

The idea, much like Mystic River, is for the audience to ask themselves, "What would they have done in the same situation?" In MR, we are supposed to identify with Sean Penn and accept that his murder of an innocent man was justified in order for him to move on after the death of his daughter. Or at least, that was my take. One of the most disturbing scenes in that movie was the scene of Laura Linney reassuring SP after the murder.

Here, we are asked to assess whether Casey Affleck's decision to return the kid to her neglectful homelife rather than leaving her with her kinder, gentler kidnappers was good or bad. The movie tries to play it ambiguous, but there are a few too many judgments thrown out. Morgan Freeman is playing one of those "raceless" roles, except you can't have it both ways. A middle-aged interracial couple with a practically Aryan 3-year-old might get a look or two and since said-tiny Aryan's picture was splattered all over the news, it stands to reason this little plan might not hold up too well.

One of the most convoluted aspects of the film's twist is that so many "useless" people are murdered in the process. Yes, people don't give much of a crap about drug dealers and pedophiles (and for good measure, the film takes the easy way out and makes all of these people extra-violent and vile). But for the most part, the People usually only like their "dirty cops" on TV. In real life, a nutty vigilante officer would scare the pants off most of the public. Are we really supposed to believe that all these cops are gonna go through all of this to save one little blond moppet?

And let's not forget the deaths of two police officers. Dirty cops, yes, but cops all the same.

I have to get back to work now. Perhaps I'll bitch about this movie more later. Or maybe I'll just block it out of my mind and move on since I just didn't like it.

Lazy Blogging

I've been laying low on the blog of late because I haven't done much. Y'all already know I watch too much TV and most times I don't stray below Channel 32 on my cable dial.

But I did the other night. I took in a show on PBS called African-American Lives 2. The show features Henry Louis Gates Jr. doing family histories with famous black folk including the still-fabulous and gorgeous Tina Turner, Sexiest Brother Alive Don Cheadle, and comedian Chris Rock and one non-famous black person. The segment I saw included such interesting factoids as Don Cheadle's ancestors were slaves of a Native American tribe called the Chickasaw? Because they were held in Indian Territory when emancipation came down the Chickasaw slaves were not released. Also Chris Rock's great-great-(great?)-grandfather fought in the Civil War (as did some of Don Cheadle's ancestors) and was one of the first black elected officials to South Carolina's something or other, but was ultimately booted by racists. And one of Tina's great-great-grandfather championed the legalization of marriage for African-Americans.

The thing most often expressed by the performers was shock and surprise that their own families had never told them any of this. That I can relate to because I don't know the first thing about our family's history. Nothing. I have often wondered about that sort of thing. What was it like for my grandparents to raise 5 children in Jim Crow Mississippi? Did any of them participate in the Movement? What was my mom doing during the 60s (well, besides raising my older sister) ? I don't even know if I could do the research at this point with my mom and her parents deceased. And I won't even get into what's happening on dad's side. Jinkies!

I also watched a documentary called The Bridge. Oddly, this was sitting in my mailbox the day I picked up this week's City Pages which features an article very similar to the one that inspired this doc (which CP does reference). The film tells the story of several suicides (and one attempt) from the Golden Gate Bridge in 2004 and includes actual footage of several of these. They aren't grisly-graphic, but man, are they hard to watch. The doc makers interviewed some of the "jumpers'" friends and family who are trying so very hard to make sense of the seemingly senseless.

I've also been watching Celebrity Rehab now and again. And you know who I hate? Daniel Baldwin, that's who. I thought born-again douchebag Stephen was the most vile of that family, but ole Danny Boy has him beat by 10 miles. Daniel came onto the show claiming to have been sober for 9 months. When he was tested upon entry and his results came back positive for coke, he claimed it was probably old coke stored in his fat cells. (I'm not high; I'm coke-boned.) Dr. Drew just gave him a "girl, please" look and deadpanned, "I've never heard that."

So being the old man in the club (well, the one with a bit of his wits about him considering Jeff Conaway doesn't know what day it is) he was kinda dubbed the Daddy of the group and took little ones like Jessica under his puffy white powder-infused wing. Oh, but Danny had secrets. Like snapping pictures of his junk on his cellphone and sending them to troubled pornstar Mary Carey, then going all half-ass Soprano telling her to "destroy" those. When it looked like all this was gonna come to a head, he made about 10 million excuses for why the rehab was making him want to use and he had to leave, but none of them included "I'm manipulating a vulnerable young woman who clearly has boundary issues". This week, all the others learned about his secret and most of them felt betrayed which brings me to who else I hate.

Ricco UFC Guy (can't be bothered to learn his full name).

Now, when all this went down Chyna and Ricco called Mary out on the fact that she was texting Danny just as he was texting her so it takes two to tango and blah blah. Agreed. Except Daniel is the one who came in proclaiming himself an example for all of them since he'd been clean for those 9 months. Mary hasn't been clean for more than a few days for her whole life. And one of her main issues is wanting to get out of an industry that she feels has exploited her. She is a grown woman, but she obviously has the emotional age of a 14-year-old girl. Daniel taking advantage of that makes him despicable.

Also, Ricco would have to cure cancer for me to forget his little story about propping his unconscious girlfriend (whom he thought was dead) in the driver's seat of a vehicle after he drunk-crashed their car. Can't face any consequences, this guy. Oh, and then there was the claiming that despite having his kids taken away by Child Protective Services, he doesn't think his addiction has affected his children. Yep, being carted away from Mommy and Daddy is a totally stabilizing event in most children's lives.

And then there is the air of misogyny that oozes from this meatheat. Upon entry he whined and moaned about Shelly and I think part of that was his not liking a dame telling him what to do. He finally shut up when no one had his back on that. There was also his and Daniel's discussion after one meeting (the one where he claimed his kids weren't affected by his addiction) where Jessica (a child of an alcoholic) called him on his b.s. and told him she didn't like him or his attitude. Daniel was all backing him up with "well, what do you expect from a 21-year-old with daddy issues"? Nice. I would expect anyone would hear Ricco's story and tell him he's a denying asshat. It is not surprising that Ricco is the one Daniel called after leaving and that Ricco told him in a sympathetic tone how everyone dogged him out and thought he was a jerk. But then in a meeting, he later claims he told Daniel how wrong he was to do that to Mary. Hey Ricco. The cameras around you? They do work. Ugh!

And finally, finally I watched the series finale of The Black Donnellys and it was so many kinds of disappointing. I mean, it had potential but it was wasted. The story went all over the place and no where at the same time. I understand that they re-wrote the epi after learning of the cancellation. It's nice to clean up story lines and all (see ya, Sampson), except not all of them really needed explaining (no one cares about Sean's girlfriend…no one!) and the ones that did, didn't get much (so did Nicky make it to the hospital?). It is like they left so much wide open in the hopes fans would do one of those 'save the show' campaigns (I could imagine boxes of saltines going to NBC in homage to the Fire Cracker). I think that sort happened, but without the Jericho results.