MBV: Compare and Contrast the old and the new

Warning! This will be kinda long, so go to the bathroom before you settle in.

I went to check out MBV 3-D on opening weekend. I thought it was pretty awesome and it felt really good to see a horror movie in the theatre again for the first time in it seems like forever for me. I think the last horror flick I remember seeing in the theatre was The Descent, but my memory ain’t what it used to be so I’m probably wrong about that.

Yesterday, Dana called and said she was sick and that I didn’t have to work that night, so I checked that evening’s TV listings and saw that jackshit was on, so I decided maybe I should see a movie. I had kind of been itching to see MBV again, so I picked the MOA theatre to check it. After a harrowing bus ride in which some fat, pregnant chick tried to sit on my damn arm, I made it just in time for the F13 trailer. I’m stoked for the movie, but I was not happy to see Jason take a little running start at someone. Jason doesn’t fucking run! (Okay, I think he kind of jogs a little bit in Pt. 2 when he’s being chased by the sheriff, but whatever.)

This viewing was actually even better than the first time. I was the ONLY person in the theater and it was one of the screens WAAAAAAY in the back of the whole cineplex and I sat in the last row the first time about 6 rows back from the screen. This made the movie creepier.

As I mentioned before, I also recently acquired the special edition DVD of the original MBV and watched it again. As I previously stated, nostalgia had lifted that movie a lot higher in my mind. Seeing it again, it actually comes off as quite cheesy because of the love triangle business and the acting is atrocious. Still, it is a genuine 80s horror film. There are funny moments, but mostly it’s because of bad fashion. This shit is straight-up horror with a genuinely frightening killer (The Miner) and the ending is pretty sweet.

The premise of the new film is slightly changed from the original. They both start out with a similar angle: a mining accident causes several men to be buried alive for several weeks. When the rescuers finally reach them, they find only one survivor, Harry Warden. Things start to differ right about here. I’ll go over the original first and come back to the newer version later.

It seems that Harry had to cannibalize his fellow miners in order to survive. We learn the accident occurred on Valentine’s Day and the town has a big dance scheduled. Because everyone is trying to rush off to the dance, someone fails to bleed the methane lines (or something) which causes an explosion.

Anyway, Harry is batshit crazy after his experience, so he’s carted off to a mental hospital. The next year around Valentine’s Day again the town plans a big dance. Harry manages to escape from the hospital and kills the two big bosses whom he blames for the accident. He cuts out their hearts and leaves a message that the town must never hold any Valentine celebrations again or he’ll be back.

The town heeds his warning, but 20 years later the town elders decide it is well-time to bring back the dance. The local sheriff and the mayor are hesitant, but are goaded on by Mabel the owner of the town launderette. Meanwhile, the young local mine workers and their girlfriends are pretty excited about the dance. One of those excited couples is T.J. and his girlfriend, Sarah. They all hang out at the local watering hole where some of the older folks talk about the legend of Harry Warden and why they think the dance is a bad idea. The younguns blow them off. (I must pause here to clarify that I call them younguns but they really aren’t all that young. These aren’t your typical teenagers or even college kids. They are 20-somethings Joe Six-Packs trying to earn a living in a small, blue-collar town)

The subplot side dish gets served up in the form of a love triangle that starts when Axel comes back to town after a 10 year absence. It seems Axel used to be Sarah’s beau, but he thought he was too good for a mining job and decided to leave for the West Coast (the Canadian equivalent of Hollywood, I imagine) without a word to anyone, including Sarah. We learn that he failed pretty miserably at whatever he was trying to do “out there” and has now come crawling back to work in the mine like everybody else. Problem is that he thinks that he should get Sarah back as well. T.J. is none too pleased with Axel all up on his girl. IMO, both guys act like dicks in the way they treat Sarah like she’s some special trophy. She doesn’t exactly help mattes by being all Olive Oyl about things for, like, forever. I kept thinking, “Get some backbone, honey, and dump both their possessive sorry asses!”

Anyway, as everyone is planning for the dance someone starts killing folks. He rips out the hearts and leaves them in candy boxes with little notes about how the dance is Bad Idea Jeans. After Mabel bites it, the mayor and the sheriff decide to cancel the dance without telling folks why (they cover up Mabel’s death as a heart attack and claim the cancellation is out of respect). The younguns are bummed and decide to go ahead and have their own party.

Meanwhile, Sarah and Axel go have a talk about their relationship. She scolds him for leaving without telling her, but ultimately decides she still wants to be with him. She doesn’t know how she will tell T.J. Boohoo.

So later, the younguns go to some local spot not far from the mine. It looks like a VFW, or whatever the Canadian equivalent would be. They bust out the Moosehead and turn up the transistor radio for some good times. The sheriff, during all this, is trying to find out if Harry Warden is indeed back and responsible for those bloody valentines. (Yeah, I went there.)

Sarah shows up for the party with T.J., but Axel is also there. Everyone is having a good ole time, until Axel starts pressing Sarah to give T.J. his ticket to Dumpsville. Sarah isn’t too hyped about doing so at the moment, it being Valentine’s Day and them being surrounded by all their friends and everything. Axel and T.J. end up throwing down. The other yokels break it up and T.J. runs off. Axel acts like he’s won, but Sarah tells him off and he leaves too. Now, Sarah’s all pouty.

Elsewhere, a couple of partiers have gone into the locker room of the mine to make out. The guy decides to go back in for some beer leaving his squeeze in this dark, foreboding room all by herself. She hears a noise and goes to investigate (natch). Suddenly the showers come on, then the mining suits hanging from above start dropping down around her, which is actually really fucking creepy, yo! Then the killer in his own mining outfit appears. He chases her into the shower room and kills her.

Inside the party, Sarah’s friend is trying to cheer her up. She gets the bright idea to have her boyfriend take them and a couple of others down into the mine. He’s hesitant, but she professes it will “cheer [Sara] up”. Yes, when I’m torn between two lovers, I love to be driven into dark, dangerous caverns with a bunch of drunks. Sarah doesn’t really want to go, but Friend convinces her “it’ll be fun”. Sara is reluctant, but ultimately agrees to go. Needless to say, she will regret that decision pretty soon.

I will stop here so as not to spoil the movie because it is totally the awesome and highly recommended. Yeah, part of that is nostalgia talking, but even with the dumb triangle and the bad acting it’s still a pretty intense story. And with the added footage (about 9 minutes), it’s sufficiently gory.

Wooooh! That was long. Perhaps I will pause here and gather my thoughts and post the second part of this tomorrow