Well, that was...a waste of money

I really wanted to like the new Friday the 13th movie. I had been so excited about it, especially after finally seeing a good horror film in My Bloody Valentine 3-D. Alas, I am among those who found the film disappointing. Everything about it seemed really slap-dash. I know most horror films don't flesh out characters very well, but this was ridiculous. These people were just vapid idiots. I imagine the actors were told their roles as such, "You play a rich jerk", "You play a stoner", "You play a black guy in a horror movie". I did jump once and I was surprised that one character I thought would survive didn't, but overall the movie really just kind of sat there. I didn't care about the characters I was supposed to care about and I couldn't even muster up enough dislike to root for anyone to die. Well, except the kid at the campfire who told the "legend of Jason" story. He must have been the "Shelly" of the film, but way less endearing and that's pretty freakin' low. I didn't even like most of the kills. Jason spent a lot of time grappling with people, flinging them around when the old Jason was all about the quick dispatch. It was clear that a few of them were meant to be homages to kills in previous F13s, but half of them were filmed so choppily and/or so darkly that you could barely tell what was going on. And I don't really care about these things, but the boobs we saw were pretty clownish. The group of teenagers behind LAUGHED at the first set shown because they practically had a price tag still hanging from them. They were like Barbie's boobs with pencil erasers attached. And the ENDING! Was DUMB! What the hell? Why would anyone do what happens at the end. Oh, I want to spoil it because I really think this movie is a totally wait for DVD, but I won't because I know people will see it regardless of what I say and I'd rather not wreck the film (any more than Platinum Dunes did) for those folks. At the end of the film, the same set of kids that laughed at the clown-tits loudly echoed my sentiments, "That's it? That blew!"

I also watched "His Name Was Jason" which is a documentary about the F13 series. I don't know what I was expecting, but I had hoped it would be more entertaining than it was. It was actually really boring. I don't think I learned anything about the story of Jason and the films that I didn't already know. Clearly, this is just a long commercial for the new film. The fact that they actually included actors from the new film perpetuates that idea in my mind.

I did finally get my F13 3-D DVD. I hope watching that tomorrow will cleanse the bad new movie from my mind.